Monday, July 30, 2007

Changing Is Always Difficult

"Why do we always press harder on the buttons of the remote control even when we know the batteries are dead." - Unknown

Sound familiar? We press harder because we are either to lazy or to stagnant in what we are doing to find the energy to get off our backside and replace the batteries. Believe it or not, many of us lead our own lives in a very similar manner. It is so much easier to believe that the way we are today is just fine. It is so much easier to believe that it is the other person who has the problem. It is so much easier to look at the other person and carefully define their faults, instead of looking deeper into our own lives and highlighting our individual faults.

As addicts, the only true way to find abstinence and the only true way to maintain your abstinence is to make the necessary, but difficult changes in your life. Lasting change, complete change, is never just cosmetic. It has to alter your entire life. You need to be able to look at yourself and see a totally changed person from the person you knew as the addict. Physically, you need to change what people see. Whatever your trademarks are, you need to lose them. Why would you want to maintain the image or reflection of an addict? Why would you want to constantly keep retelling the stories of your failures in life, when it is so refreshing to tell of the successes in your life.

Emotionally, you need to find your own balance, a place where you are comfortable within your own skin. Emotional balance, for an addict, is the most difficult to achieve. Our emotions always seem to be on a roller coaster, changing sometimes by the minute, thus making it very difficult for the people who are closest to us. For me personally, it is my greatest challenge. Finding an inner peace, that permits me to re-connect with society, usually gets me running in the wrong direction. It has to be extremely difficult for the people in my life to deal with my many emotions, especially when my own imbalance is so affected by these same emotions.

Spiritually, is where we can find the majority of our answers. Most recovering addicts have some type of relationship with their own Higher Power, as they believe it to be. For me, my faith has saved my life. My belief that God will never burden us with something we cannot handle, as well as my belief that anything I cannot handle can be given to my Higher Power, has carried me to where I am today. The "First Step" is admitting that we are powerless over our addiction and that our lives have become unmanageable, and the "Second Step" is coming to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to a normal way of thinking and living.

Physical, emotional and spiritual change, difficult - yes, possible - yes, rewarding - definitely. Saying you want to change just won't get it done. Admitting that you have a problem and that you need to make some changes just won't get it done. Believing that quitting alone will solve your problems just won't get it done. All you are really doing is pressing harder on the buttons hoping the channel will change. Change will come, rewarding change will come, when you make the commitment to get off your backside and get a new set of batteries.

1 Comments:

Blogger SAM said...

Once more, all I can say is that I admire your writing, but most of all: your struggle in this new path you have choosen!

Thank you for keeping on.

9:15 PM  

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